I'm sorry you're being faced with the prejudices of the most privileged in the queer community. I came of age in Southern California (LA to be exact, home of WeHo). It was not easy for your average homosexual! The hot guys (including bartenders) were usually just downright mean if you weren't at their level of muscularity and prettiness. Generally, I just learned to adapt: I'd avoid the A list gays as much as possible, or would only go to their haunts (Rage, Fubar, etc.) if I was with a group of mere gay mortals. Better yet, bars in the suburbs and surrounding areas offered up diversity and a more relaxed vibe. Bit this doesn't address the real problem: gays who think so highly of themselves that they dismiss or target for rudeness or bullying everyone else. These frat boy homos think they're at the top of the food chain, kinda like the 1%, but they're also the minority. I think the answer is creating inclusive spaces, or taking up the space you're entitled to in spaces that already exist, staking out your territory and not letting the frat bros dominate it. Waiting for the assholes to see the error of their ways and come around will most likely be a losing game; better to take the initiative and set the tone. I'm not sure how exactly to go about doing this, but if you have a clear goal in mind (inclusive queer spaces) then you're off to a good start. Now you've just got to work together to make it happen.