Like other commenters, I was out decades ago, spending time in gay bars which, back then (pre-internet) were our primary meeting spaces. The issues you describe have always been an aspect of gay bars, however, while reading your article I did remember spending time in queer spaces that included a variety of ages, races and body types. Lesbians even hung out in our bars although, since they had their own bars, they were in the minority. In L.A., the West Hollywood bars were the ones that were most ageist, most body-shaming and most unwelcoming to those who didn't fit the WeHo ideal (white with muscles, money and attitude). WeHo bars and clubs back then were like how I perceive Grindr to be now: rigid, exclusionary, and stressful. The bars in the surrounding cities and suburbs were much more diverse and welcoming, but the hierarchy based upon youth and fuckability has always been present. I think it's great you want to have a community discussion about it. The internet makes doing that much easier, you can engage more people, and I look forward to seeing follow up posts about your efforts.