Raymond G. Neal
1 min readAug 18, 2023

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My ex-husband and I owned a house together and divorced after roughly 11 years together. I wouldn't characterize our marriage as "terrible" but we had grown apart and I stayed employed at a toxic workplace for years because I was responsible for paying the mortgage. The house represented so much to both of us, individually and as a couple, but the love in our relationship had dried up and we stayed married to, above all else, keep the house. The most difficult part of divorce for me was that, once the process began, all of my memories and feelings from our history together came to the front: how it felt when we fell in love, got married, built our life together, bought the house, fixed it up and created a home, etc. All of the expectations, good intentions and plans we'd had, which were from our hearts, genuine, and which I'd effectively forgotten about in my frustration with the state of our marriage, came flooding back to me, unexpectedly, and I was blindsided. It was devastating, the most difficult thing I've ever gone through. I don't wish divorce upon anyone, and get why it's so scary. But having gone through it, I'm much better off (and so is my ex). If your marriage is dead, getting out isn't easy, but in the long run it's worth it.

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Raymond G. Neal
Raymond G. Neal

Written by Raymond G. Neal

Queer Power, Pop Culture, Community. "minis." hits it on Valentine's Day! Forget about that man ho and make a date with "minis." https://www.raymondgneal.com

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